My Grandpa [to me]: "Give my regards to BROADWAY." [pissed that dinner at a wedding was running late, skipping town and not saying goodbye to any of the family.]
Dad: "You smell like smarties."
Me: "What?? That's a weird thing to say, Dad."
Dad: "Why? It's a good thing...I think."
My third cousin [referring to me]: "She was in Iraq."
Other guy: "Oh, was she a nurse?"
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